Careless vs. Carefree
Lately I’ve been feeling pretty controlling. I must have control of everything. Especially my weight. I’ve been practically killing myself. I wish I could be carefree about everything. I’m just so scared that my life is going to start spiraling out of control. It’s super hot in my place right now which is causing me to have huge headaches and making me want to throw up. I’ve almost felt like vomiting it all out. Especially after eating Taco Bell or Burger King. I haven’t yet, and I’m going to try and keep it that way. Next time I’ll just think about how much I’m going to want to throw up afterwards and how much I’ll hate myself and then not eat it. I’ll pinch my bulging leg fat and move on. The weekends kill me though. I can usually control my diet throughout the week but when it gets to the weekend I blow it all. I hate my thighs.They’re the grossest feature about my body; besides my huge hips. I’m dreading bathing suit season so I need to start going to the gym. That’ll make this diet more effective.
I know I’ve got issues.
I’ve been listening to:
- The Smiths
- The Cure
- The Helio Sequence
I’ve probably been listening to more; I just can’t think right now.
-Rosemary Paige
